Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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