Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize