So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
