is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize