i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
