your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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