Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
My breasts were aching with rage.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
