i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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