I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
