We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
