UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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