Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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