I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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