Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
