Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Randomize
