im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
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