3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Randomize
