butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Randomize
