nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Randomize
