Quick, to the slutcave!
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
