This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
