I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
