Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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