I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
