I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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