is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
