Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
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