im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
