so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
