Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
