im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
dude. I can hear the air.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
