In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize