he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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