i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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