fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Houston, we have a blender
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
