yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
