fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize