As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
