My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize