Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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