Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize