i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
