I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize