I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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