So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
