Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
