I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
