How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
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