hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Randomize
