We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
