please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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