You made me cry and you don't even care
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
