I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
