I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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